Showing posts with label Al Gore. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Al Gore. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
VIDEO: 'A fat man flying!'
In Boston in 1773, Molly Far saw a horrifying vision: From the Pasadena Tea Party Patriots and, in case you didn't recognize the actress playing Molly, it's SNL alumna Victoria Jackson. Molly's prophetic vision of the bounteous land of fruit turned into a barren wilderness on account of a smelt is, alas, all too real.
Labels:
Al Gore,
California,
environmentalism,
Tea Party,
video
Monday, November 30, 2009
Mötley CR:Ü: Shout at the Data
by Smitty
What better answer to the Warmaquiddick hair ball than a hair band?
The artistic dreck that is Mötley Crüe is the perfect contrast to the scientific dreck that is the Climate Research Unit, and I expect this will be the first of many parodies.
Shout shout shout
Shout shout shout
Shout at the data!
ManBearPig screaming lonely in the night
Carbon footprint on the stay-yay-yage
Warming fear in your eye
Being taxed by his lies
He's the Cap on your back--he's rage
Occam's razor on your life
Oh, lonely are our wives
My head's spinnin' round and round
But when the seasons are bent
He stands, incontinent
We're strong and laugh and
[Chorus]
Shout shout shout
Shout at the data
Shout shout shout
They 'steal' the mail from the serv
Calls for blood at the nerve
And then have you crying at coh-oh-ode
Steals integrity from youth
With his Inconvenient Truth
The polar bear guilt mother lode
He'll be the Florida in the math
And maybe Michael Moore's wrath
Might run scared for the door
It's like M. C. Escher
Crossed with Fran Drescher
Were strong and laugh and
[Chorus]
[Repeat V1]
[Chorus]
Update: Pecunious Predator 'lanch
Update II: Rightofcourse goes Vaudeville.
Update III: Robert Gibbs. "No real scientific basis for the dispute of this." Oh, Robert, your lobotomy scar is showing.
What better answer to the Warmaquiddick hair ball than a hair band?
The artistic dreck that is Mötley Crüe is the perfect contrast to the scientific dreck that is the Climate Research Unit, and I expect this will be the first of many parodies.
Shout shout shout
Shout shout shout
Shout at the data!
ManBearPig screaming lonely in the night
Carbon footprint on the stay-yay-yage
Warming fear in your eye
Being taxed by his lies
He's the Cap on your back--he's rage
Occam's razor on your life
Oh, lonely are our wives
My head's spinnin' round and round
But when the seasons are bent
He stands, incontinent
We're strong and laugh and
[Chorus]
Shout shout shout
Shout at the data
Shout shout shout
They 'steal' the mail from the serv
Calls for blood at the nerve
And then have you crying at coh-oh-ode
Steals integrity from youth
With his Inconvenient Truth
The polar bear guilt mother lode
He'll be the Florida in the math
And maybe Michael Moore's wrath
Might run scared for the door
It's like M. C. Escher
Crossed with Fran Drescher
Were strong and laugh and
[Chorus]
[Repeat V1]
[Chorus]
Update: Pecunious Predator 'lanch
Update II: Rightofcourse goes Vaudeville.
Update III: Robert Gibbs. "No real scientific basis for the dispute of this." Oh, Robert, your lobotomy scar is showing.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Oh, and another point about Gore
by Smitty
The Blogprof has some bunk by Al comparing Global Warming to Civil Rights.
Al's credibility is thoroughly shot. While there is always hope for redemption in the future, at least in the theological sense. However, the present and the past are all suspect.
For example, the 2000 election. Al was on Weekend Update with Seth Myers recently trying to make a dry joke about being a 'popular vote' guy. As we start roasting a few ACORNs over an open legal fire, what revelations about the 2000 election might emerge? Was the whole Florida thing just an attempt to work the refs, as Al Franken more recently did with success?
That's the thing, Al: your reputation is your most vital asset. Your best hope for redemption is to go write a tell-all memoir and just come clean about the whole global takeover plot.
The Blogprof has some bunk by Al comparing Global Warming to Civil Rights.
Al's credibility is thoroughly shot. While there is always hope for redemption in the future, at least in the theological sense. However, the present and the past are all suspect.
For example, the 2000 election. Al was on Weekend Update with Seth Myers recently trying to make a dry joke about being a 'popular vote' guy. As we start roasting a few ACORNs over an open legal fire, what revelations about the 2000 election might emerge? Was the whole Florida thing just an attempt to work the refs, as Al Franken more recently did with success?
That's the thing, Al: your reputation is your most vital asset. Your best hope for redemption is to go write a tell-all memoir and just come clean about the whole global takeover plot.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Yeah, well, the Academy don't give a damn
by Smitty
Look, Gore: we don't care what Thor says about the friggin' Nobel Peace Prize. Putting you in company with Barack, Jimmy, and Yasser makes a poetic statement about you for the ages. Also, the Scandinavians have oil.
We, on the other hand, have to consider the future. We awarded you an Oscar for a documentary, not a drama. That means that the material has to be, you know, valid.
Considering the moronic hijinks of our current crop of stars, constantly shilling for Teh One, the spinelessness of our directors, the utter dreck we call scripts, and the fact that all of the sheep we regularly shear are completely broke, we need a victim. A big victim. A victim with a name. For example: Al.
Now, if you don't want to see a flick featuring a former Vice President who...
Your crappy stunts, and the idiotic policies of our day are so bad that we may be forced to go back to producing material that edifies and ennobles the audience just to recoup from your idiocy. We can't support your kind of rank propaganda--the blowback is killing us. So just fork over the statue quietly, and we won't have to film "Our Choice Assault on the Inconvenient Balance of Jackassery".
For all that, we don't want to appear peevish compared to Thor, so we'll slide you a substitute Oscar in suitable container:
Look, Gore: we don't care what Thor says about the friggin' Nobel Peace Prize. Putting you in company with Barack, Jimmy, and Yasser makes a poetic statement about you for the ages. Also, the Scandinavians have oil.
We, on the other hand, have to consider the future. We awarded you an Oscar for a documentary, not a drama. That means that the material has to be, you know, valid.
Considering the moronic hijinks of our current crop of stars, constantly shilling for Teh One, the spinelessness of our directors, the utter dreck we call scripts, and the fact that all of the sheep we regularly shear are completely broke, we need a victim. A big victim. A victim with a name. For example: Al.
Now, if you don't want to see a flick featuring a former Vice President who...
- Is credited with inventing a new communications medium
- Attempts to re-invent government, somehow makes it suck more
- Tries and fails to rig an election
- Collaborates with a bunch of socially mal-adapted climate nerds on world-wide, multi-billion dollar scam
- Has said scam blow up in his face the day before he goes on SNL to flog some book of his that no one is going to read
Your crappy stunts, and the idiotic policies of our day are so bad that we may be forced to go back to producing material that edifies and ennobles the audience just to recoup from your idiocy. We can't support your kind of rank propaganda--the blowback is killing us. So just fork over the statue quietly, and we won't have to film "Our Choice Assault on the Inconvenient Balance of Jackassery".
For all that, we don't want to appear peevish compared to Thor, so we'll slide you a substitute Oscar in suitable container:
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Al Gore on SNL
by Smitty
Al Gore is on SNL to flog his new book. No, this blog won't bother putting in a URL, much less trying to figure out the title of the forgettable thing.
Unfortunately, he's been made a fool by the global warming emails, and he sounds a fool on weekend update.
The real question is by how many orders of magnitude Sarah Palin will outsell Al Gore, the only many capable of making Harry Reid seem a dynamic speaker in comparison.
Al Gore is on SNL to flog his new book. No, this blog won't bother putting in a URL, much less trying to figure out the title of the forgettable thing.
Unfortunately, he's been made a fool by the global warming emails, and he sounds a fool on weekend update.
The real question is by how many orders of magnitude Sarah Palin will outsell Al Gore, the only many capable of making Harry Reid seem a dynamic speaker in comparison.
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